The 7 Dreaded Steps of Your Office Secret Santa

 

With only a couple of weeks to go until Christmas day we are well and truly in the midst of the seasonal cheer. If you haven’t already, it’s time to max out your credit cards, slump in The 7 Perils of Office Secret Santafront of the television and eat your body weigh in… well pretty much everything.

It is also that time of year when your office decides how much fun it would be to do Secret Santa again, and when you realise it’s more stressful than finding a gift for your mother-in-law.

1.Setting a Price Limit

This is probably the most thought out aspect of Secret Santa as no one really wants to spend a fortune. It’s even worse when you have to buy for someone you don’t know all that well, or in fact don’t really like – you’ll be damned if you have to spend more than a tenner on Bob from accounting.

2.Picking a Name from the Hat

Great you picked Bob from accounting!

3.Not So Secret Santa

All your colleagues ask around for gift advice and end up spilling who they have.

Every. Single. Year. Do they not understand the concept of this game?

Beware wary of the one colleague who takes it upon themselves to find out who everyone is buying for; they’ll tell Bob you bought him the gift he hates so much.

4.Shopping with No Results

You end up spending hours online and picking up potential gifts everywhere you go, but nothing is good enough. You so desperately want to be a great Secret Santa but the fear of being judged no matter what you buy plays over in your mind:

Funny – Is it really that funny? You decide that humour is relatively subjective and what you find hilarious will probably go down like a lead balloon at the office. Therefore you steer clear of anything that makes you laugh.

            Rude – It’s fairly similar to funny, just more likely to cause offense. It’s tempting, but you decide you’d rather not have to be called into your office for upsetting Bob from accounting.

Expensive – You’ve already forgotten how pleased you were when the £10 budget was agreed, as you realise there’s not much out there for a tenner. On the other hand gifts that are obviously overpriced can easily say “I’m trying to impress” or worse “I like you”. You’d rather avoid both scenarios so resort back to the impossible.

            Original - Do all guys want beer, football and car related gifts? Do all the ladies love bubble baths and chocolate? Probably not… jeez this is hard.

5.Realisation

You decide that there is absolutely nothing you can buy and temporarily give up, hoping that inspiration will strike soon. You realise in the process that you know very little about your co-workers and in turn they probably know very little about you. You therefore prepare yourself for an equally terrible gift.

6.Sudden Panic

You only have a couple of days to go until you are scheduled to exchange gifts and you still have nothing. So you bite the bullet and buy that gift you saw weeks ago, no one will know it’s from you anyway.

Wrong. Your colleagues can’t keep secrets remember, therefore Secret Santa at your office is anything but.

7.The Big Exchange

Your gift seems to have gone down quite well and you’re pleasantly please with yours too. Perhaps it’s not so bad after all.

Posted by Paul Randall
11th December 2014